Breathe through the Holiday

Christmas and Hanukkah are less than a week away and your stress level is outer limits. Do you feel confused? Have you experienced frustration? Are there delays wherever you go? That's because Mercury is in retrograde. Sometimes it can seem as if the planets are moving backwards through the zodiac. According to Almanac.com this sense, is called "retro grade emotion." Mercury does this three to four times a year which causes all this chaos. So what can you do?

Breathe. Squeeze. Vent Write or BS VW (dub)

I know what you’re thinking. “You want me to breathe when I am stuck in a long mall line and bratty, unruly kids are screaming and running around? You want me to breathe when I’m waiting for more than 15 minutes at a restaurant and still can’t get a drink and those same bratty kids seemed to be related to the ones at the mall? You want me to breathe when I am in traffic for 20 minutes, the cars are not moving, and that rude jerk just cut me off?” Worst of all Aunt Ethel will be at holiday dinner and she never shuts the F*^& up!

Traditional mindful meditation will not be useful in these types of scenarios but you can do several types of deliberate strategies to help calm you down.

1. Square Breathing: Picture a square in your mind. Breathe in and out slowly while you move around the square. It is important to hold in your breath for at least 7 seconds and exhale for 5- 7 seconds. Do the square breathing at least 3 times.

2. Squeeze Breathing: Do the same as above but as you inhale squeeze a squish ball of some type or the steering wheel, cart, or just make a stiff fist. If you are able, when you inhale squeeze your whole body as tight as you can, then exhale and release the tension. Do this action at least 3 times.

3. Squeeze Breathe Venting: If the two strategies above do not work try this. While you are inhaling and squeezing your fist, visualize the person you are upset with is in your hand. As you squeeze this person as tight as you are able, you can vent your frustration “quietly” by venting in your mind what you really think of them. It will be helpful to use as sweet a voice (in your mind) as possible as you vent: “You know what you little shit. I am going to shut you up because your parent is an incompetent ass*#$%!!!” Be creative and have fun with it. You are not hurting anyone because it is in your mind. You can even smile sweetly at the person as you squeeze their brains out!

4. Breathe Vent Writing: Sometimes when you are in a restaurant you are able to write your venting down on a napkin, paper, or maybe even a small journal. The action of writing and breathing actually helps you to calm down while telling the person off and not getting kicked out of the bar. After you write down your venting session of what you’d really like to do to the waiter you can rip the paper into tiny shreds. The act of ripping helps release the anger. So rip away! But don’t for get to breathe!

One important thing to remember is to NEVER GIVE AWAY YOUR POWER! Don’t let other inconsiderate, selfish people allow you to lose your cool and win.You will win and be in control as long as you stay calm and composed.If you make a game out of a bad situation, it becomes more entertaining and you move from frustration to laughter and control. See how many times you can SQUEEZE the life out of them ever so sweetly!

So when you are with your “favorite family members” during the holidays instead of getting wasted and throwing a drink in their face, squeeze ball their brains out instead.You will be kinder to your mind and body and chances are you won’t have a terrible hangover either!