Lemons or Lemonade? Don't Be a Sour Soul

You know that old saying, “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade,” by Dale Carnegie? Yeah. I hate that saying too. It’s probably because we know it’s true and we hate having to admit that it’s true. I mean, why can’t life be lemonade all the time? Mental illness patients in particular, struggle with this concept.

I think sometimes the Universe guides us, or pushes us down paths that we don’t really want, because we refuse to move forward in a way that will make us truly happy. We stay in a thankless job, or unhappy relationships, or even live in a home we just settled for because it’s just easier. We stay in bed to avoid the inevitable. It is uncomfortable and very scary to step outside of ourselves and into the unknown so if we don’t have to, we won’t. So then what? We wake up 20 years later miserable and wondering what the hell happened to our lives.

It is important to go after what we want, but it is also important to know that we always have choices. Hopefully, we don’t wallow too long in the “poor me” path of life. Here’s a story I hope you like about a girl who turned her lemons into lemonade or rather turned tennis into tennis-ade.

Leila wanted to become a good tennis player someday. In fact, she wanted to be a famous tennis player, earning prize money for winning. She awoke at 5 am every day to practice her serve. After school she would go to the pro tennis arenas and watch the semi-pros train for hours on end. Finally, she would end her day practicing again with her tennis coach.

Days were long, practices were grueling, especially the runs, but Leila persisted through it all. Weekends were the hardest part of the commitment to tennis because while all her teenage friends were having fun going to the beach, buying prom dresses, and learning how to drive, she was occupying her time with tennis. She loved tennis more than anything, but will all her hard work pay off?

Along with rigorous training, came rigorous bullying. As a tennis player, Leila not only had to endure unique strength and conditioning challenges, she had to acquire thick skin and be wary of all competitors. On one such match, Leila had been on the court for more than three hours. Her regular shoes went missing but Leila proceeded to serve despite the discomfort in her heels and back. Just as she reached up to whack the ball with her racket, she felt a snap right at the ridge of her shoulder. Excruciating pain emanated from her neck down to her torso to the lower back, Leila thought she would die. Not from the pain, but from the thought of being seriously injured.

Fighting through the pain, Leila did her best but could not go on. She withdrew from her match, and she knew something was seriously wrong. The following day, Leila’s parents took her to a specialist where X-rays, MRI, and other tests were administered. Leila figured she had tennis elbow, in which the outer part of the elbow becomes sore and tender or the tendons become damaged from repetitive overuse. This would put her on the sideline for a couple of weeks and Leila was having none of that, in her mind she would be back on the court as soon as possible.

When the doctor appeared with Leila’s test results, his face was stern and solemn. Leila’s heart began pounding out of her chest, her legs were trembling and twitching, and she could not stop twisting her hair. “I’m afraid I have bad news,” the doctor began stoically. “In addition to the inflammation in your tendons, you have serious spinal fractures. This can cause permanent nerve damage that leads to a loss of sensation or a tingling sensation in your extremities. These fractures can also be serious enough to cause paralysis.” Leila’s jaw tightened as her fingernails clawed into the seat cushion where she was seated. Her mom, devastated from the news instantly began sobbing. Leila’s dad, just put his head down, shaking it from side to side. “How could this have happened?” Leila cried aloud. “No more tennis? How can this be?” Suddenly, she began an uncontrollable wailing of emotion.

The doctor continued after Leila was subdued, “Treatment for serious fractures of this nature involves surgery to stabilize the spine and relieve pressure on the spinal cord.” The doctor went on and on for what seemed like hours, but Leila had already tuned him out. It was literally the worst nightmare of her life. All her hard work, training, and sacrifices were just gone in an instant. The family drove home in silence.

A year had passed since that tragic day and Leila never again would set foot on a tennis court for competition. Instead, she used her tragic experience to educate others by writing a book about bullying on the tennis court. She still traveled, but instead of competing she spoke in front of large audiences on how to prevent injuries, but more importantly how to prevent bullying and incidences such as the one that ended her career. Leila still loves tennis; she just embraces it now in a different way.

What will you do today to make your lemonade?

Patti Martin is a Reading Specialist with a PhD in Education. Along with Mindfulness classes, Doc Martin now offers Emergent Literacy classes for children who are struggling with reading, writing, and spelling.